67 – The Cheating Waterfall…

12 08 2010

So I have discovered that when I cheat once, I tend to cheat more in the next hours and day. I crave it… I can’t stop the cravings. It’s worse when I am alone too – cause I don’t have the willpower to say no when no one else is there to watch me. Horrible, right?

The bad part also, is that when I cheat, I tend to cheat big! It sucks. Last night we were camping, and the only place to eat in a 30-mile radius was a little hamburger stand. No big deal. So I got a burger, fries, and a milkshake. Why did I have to get the milkshake? Who knows? It tasted great, but did I need it, no… Then today, I had a cupcake when I got off work. But I didn’t stop there – the cascade kept flowing. For dinner I had chicken tenders and mac-n-cheese from our local deli/grocery store. Horrible. Now – I am stuffed, and my stomach hurts. And I feel horrible about myself. It is like all these foods are an instant shot of self-deprication. My advice for anyone who wants to feel like shit and hate themselves – eat a bunch of shitty, processed foods that aren’t good for you.

You will instantly feel bad about yourself, feel fat, and start hating your life. Sounds like fun, right? So – why do we keep doing this to ourselves? Why do I keep doing this to myself????

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